2008

Happy 4th!

http://menwholooklikezachbraff.blogspot.com/ This is absolutely killing me. LOL

FOR ABOUT 80 PERCENT OF YOU THIS IS REALLY...

Me: How's [redacted]?
Mom: She had a baby shower last week. I went to Babies R Us and got her a gift certificate so she can go fuck herself with it.

taking the day off to be with mummy…. massages and tacky tourist things

Me: I think you might actually like Hollywood and Highland. It's where all the superheroes are.
Mom: You mean the LARPers?
Me: What?
Mom: Live action role players?

drned: why is rashida jones not in more things, namely My...

I want this bedding. I can mediumishly afford it. I already...

keeping it really real

hydeordie: Damn I miss these men. via soupsoup

Hey! I know what next season should be called! Tori and Dean: Deserving Each Other

paulscheer: Nothing says that I’m totally fine not being in...

Well all wake up with a dick on our face from time to time.

“me: yeah for videos that i do on my own though i get paid by...”

After Arrested Development this is one of the most...

Mom: Have you met John Davis yet?
Me: Who?
Mom: The guy who wrote the 90210 theme song. What the fuck have you been doing out here?

going for an amazing steak dinner in k-town with my mom… this part of town is full of...

fact: i got into a slap fight with molly...

3 Movie Characters I Identify With

(peterwknox:elizabethanne:kwestie:lovepuppy:lfarm:tylerriewer) Enid in Ghost World Dawn Wiener in...

setting the standard

setting the standard

like, i'm actually concerned

OK, so maybe it’s the big Girl Talk dork in me, but Julia Allison knows that Night Ripper is...

Dear Britney, Your ass’ situation is a concern for...

boringloser: My eyelid is puffy. Could any doctors on Tumblr...

What Happens To Your Body Within An Hour Of...

Nike releases Back To The Future II...

just ate one of mom’s tuna sandwiches… now im going to lay in my bed and watch 90210....

I guess that I was the only one who couldn’t figure out that Dennis Rodman was hitting on me...

my mom is dancing to the muzak in the...

Me: Mom. Stop it. Stop it or that guy over there is going to find us and rape you later.
Mom: Rape me! More like "invite me to a party and make me dance for him"!

Me: Sometimes I think we don't look that much alike.
Mom: That's because we're brothers.

running late to pick my mom up at the airport. i am the worst daughter ever. btw, i smell.

Dear Bristol Farms Employees, Exactly how long have you been...

Listen

caragh: I just received a voicemail from my boss that was basically a bunch of mumbling. I called...

“It’s Pride Weekend. I can do whatever the fuck I want to.”
— My philosophy for the next 48...

rosie o'donnell has something to say to you

this is the best way to ask out a chick i...

if there is anyone out there who doesn't...

great balls of fire

“25 percent of women always climax during sex with a partner....”
— Anatomy of an Orgasm, Women’s...

dreams are not real life.

I had a dream last night where I spent $75 dollars on a ticket to see Moby. I didn’t even...

Weird incidence

manymachines: Molly McAleer: Skate Or Die! (But, Preferably, Just Die) vs Mission Mission: Skate or...

i’m watching a rerun of 90210 and there’s a dude shooting meth in his toes and...

omg, i just ordered a pizza. when it gets here, i’m going to eat it

florencio: descuartizamiento

Second best thing I will see on the internet...

Dear Potential Future Husbands, I would like to give this...

this is my husband

Ed: I feel like Ms. Stockard Channing in Six Degrees of Separation right now.
Me: Why?
Ed: There's a scene in the movie where she walks out of this Park Ave dinner party because she is fed up with her husband/life and the camera follows her down Park Ave and she is dressed to the nines (as I am today) and the music is some German classical composer and she jumps up and touches this tree. She has no real reason to be happy but she is and that's exactly how I feel right now.

“Oh, dang. She looks like a fluffernutter.”

On Seth Rogen

Ed: You know, before he was famous I saw him at Whole Foods and I like, liked him.
Me: Well then how'd you know it was him?
Ed: Because when I saw 40 Year Old Virgin I was all "Oh my God! That's the guy from Whole Foods!"

happy birthday, mom. thanks for letting me...

RESERVED!

mollyperry.tumblr.com mollyperrypresents.tumblr.com thefilmsofmollyperry.tumblr.com atumblrbymollyper...

it was. it was tyler perry's why did i...

Hyde: Well, I was just saying that...
Molls: I'm sorry, I got distracted, is that a copy of Tyler Perry's Why Did I Get Married on your table?
Hyde: .....Maybe.

Does anyone know the type of font Doogie Howser journaled in? Blue screen, white font, PC,...

watching a rerun of MADE right now… This show is tragic.

good one

Listen

Taking sonny boy on a walk to Coffee Bean… up and at em early today.

Molly Perry’s Why Did I Eat Tacos?

I got this image while google imaging the words...

i am long overdue for a terrible case of...

1001vaginas.com -- page 25 is my fave

Wagandstuff and I just had a sweet moment in which he made me believe that he loves me.

three reasons why people are fucking...

1) Remember that blogger Maddox? Maddox.xmission.com? From like, the mid-90s? Someone said Maddox to...

short list

I asked someone tonight to give me their short list of facts that they would like people to know...

there were some dinosaurs on the metro this...

SHIT, and i was drinking English Breakfast all this time.

INTERPOL

Interpol seems to be a band you either love or hate. I happen to love them despite some of their...

heidi montag's new single

someone told me about this MONTHS ago and...

Headed to Here with my husband and some other fabulous gentlemen…

“coolin’ by day and at night working up a sweat” - salt

sitting in my air conditioned bedroom. what will suck more— moving or staying hungry?

does anyone else remember Kelly and Dylan having really gross, sloppy sounding kisses. Gross mouth...

my mom is coming to town for a week in just under 6 days…

faker

So apparently there’s a fake copy of Feed the Animals going around. That’s what’s...

Listen

“You’re not Howard Stern! You’re my landlord, Mr. Pitts!” - Donna Martin

just removed some gross nail polish— walking wags for an iced coffee now… wearing my AA...

my hair smells like a man, which is odd because it certainly hasn’t been around any lately.

totally exhausted from this week/last night. passing out with the pup early so I can get my brain...

This picture was taken by Raul from Phantom of the Opera.

chewable b-12 vitamins

Me: Did we have four drinks last night?
Hyde: Five. We had FIVE drinks last night.
Me: Oh my God! Five drinks?! You guys, I am so proud of myself. I had five vodkas last night and I didn't puke.
Kendall: Molly, I think we're all proud of you.

kaitziskin: itsbedtime: The Edison downtown with Kendall and Hyde… drop by if you wanna say...

The Edison downtown with Kendall and Hyde… drop by if you wanna say hellooooo

Those? Oh, those are just my wigs…

slippy: I just want to know if it’s really stupid going to Death Valley this weekend. I have no idea...

kendall and i got in a huge fight

wowowowoowowwowowoow

delbertshoopman: PLAYBOY BUNNIES… BUNNIES!!! I think I know...

Are American Apparel track shorts too short to wear out of...

9/11 views on our “Finding a Husband”...

Freudian Text: noun

hydeordie: Definition: accidentaly texting someone who the original text wasn’t intended for...

thingscaitlineats: 4:40 pm Box I just discovered this...

This chick is my pick for Tim Russert’s replacement on...

Listen

boringloser: Random Final Cut Pro Frame - 6/19/2008 KENDALL!...

I’m really drunk. I just ate six mini donuts and a slim jim. now im drinking chocolate milk.

today was fucking hell… so excited to see amy poehler at ucb tonight.

for some reason i’m really dying to go back to souplantation. shhhh… don’t tell...

If I haven’t said it already yet today GIRL TALK CHANGED U 7EVA

“it’s like church is for desperate people”

A Transcript of Me & Molly McAleer...

ME: wooha got you all in checkkkk
MOLLY: listening to girltalk makes me like, so spiritully overwhelemed
ME: OMG
ME: this one thing he did just made me laugh out loud
ME: holy shit
MOLLY: i just started
MOLLY: fucking a
MOLLY: already so amazing
ME: 'What Its All About', the track, is fucking AMAZZING
MOLLY: i cant even handle this
MOLLY: my brain
MOLLY: is exploding
ME: GAH
10: 20 AM
MOLLY: OH FUCK
MOLLY: dang
MOLLY: this is fucking banana
MOLLY: s
MOLLY: till here
MOLLY: Oh My God
MOLLY: the end of it
MOLLY: fuck
ME: what it's all about is so amazing
ME: NO WWAYY
ME: HEART VS PUBLIC ENEMY
ME: thats insane.
ME: this is the greatest album ever made.
ME: by humans.
MOLLY: i've heard a lot of this live
MOLLY: when i saw him at the echo
MOLLY: it's good to hear what was from the new album now
MOLLY: this jackson 5 at the end
MOLLY: is epic
ME: this is like the biggest Fuck You ever to hipster djs
ME: which is AMAZING
ME: i speak as one
ME: OH SHIT
ME: OHHHH FUCK
MOLLY: SET IT OFF
MOLLY: REAL LOVE
ME: this is LIGHT YEARS beyond anything
MOLLY: oh wow
ME: like, i have never in my life heard something this awesome
ME: its better than anything in the last 10 years.
10: 30 AM
ME: everyone should have this album.
MOLLY: no, i completely agree
MOLLY: OH SHIT
MOLLY: WOOORRRRKKK IT
MOLLY: i really am in trouble with myself for listening to this now
MOLLY: i have so much to do
ME: this is better than Night Ripper.
MOLLY: yes
MOLLY: which was
MOLLY: EPIC
MOLLY: that album changed music for me
MOLLY: holy shit.
ME: WOW.
ME: NO WAY
ME: OH MY GOD
ME: FUCK
ME: THIS IS RELIGIOUS
MOLLY: yeah
MOLLY: it's really important
ME: 'give me a beat' is fucking way too brilliant
MOLLY: haha, omg
MOLLY: so exicciiiitted
MOLLY: i had to stop listening
MOLLY: or i will get fired

Listen

new Girl Talk available for download: http://74.124.198.47/illegal-art.net/ I want to make out with...

if you don’t like it i’ll roll over and roll alone, fuck you and the horse that you rode...

When you Google image search the words “hot...

THANK. GOD.

Hey, Kendall: Remember this?

fact: lindsay lohan has a dick.

apparently Get Smart sucks a fat one, FYI

I have noticed that some people I know immediately change their outlook on Julia Allison once they...

i ate souplantation

im hungry… my new phone came, just gotta get the numbers transferred and this blackberry dramz...

slippy: Lunch For some anorexic girl you know?

slippy: Word of advice: Trust the ones that believe in you, no matter what. Ditch the ones who...